E-mail Gem of the Week

Know Thy Enemy
Fun Facts About Liberals

• The main diet of the liberal is tofu and granola. This makes them puny and easy to throw.
  
  
• Liberals will try to entice you with their twisted logic. Counter with a bitch slap.
  
  
• Hanging a picture of Ronald Reagan over your door will keep liberals from entering
  
  
• Liberals are against nuclear weapons but have yet to suggest a soy-based substitute that can obliterate cities.
  
  
• If you see a fuel-effecient car, it's probably being driven by a liberal. Run it off the road with your SUV.
  
  
• Liberals are constantly inflaming the culture war. They seem to forget which side has all the guns.
  
  
• The most dangerous predator of liberals is the real world. They hide from it in college campuses.
  
  
• Inspired by rhyming slogans and giant puppets, liberals sometimes congregate into groups known as "protests." The purpose of these is unknown.
  
  
• liberals are always whining about tolerance, but when I punch them for that, they get moody. Hey, Be tolerant!